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Johanna Johanna

by Johanna Johanna

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1.
Back to You 03:30
Everyone says i’m crazy and that’s what I tell myself but you saw me in a different light than anyone else. I know you had to say goodbye when I stopped trying but I miss you. I know I have somethings to do, but someday I’ll come back and take care of you. I do the best I can, I try to tell the truth and it always seems, always seems to come back to you. I’m returning my promises I could never keep. They push me to the edge and you away from me. You away from me. If years and years and years could just go by, then maybe I could stop my crying. I used to sleep so peacefully but now I kick and dream of you and me. I thought about moving away to ease my pain. But here I sit, I can’t move and inch hoping you might pass my way. I do the best I can, I try to tell the truth and it always seems, always seems to come back to you. I’m returning my promises I could never keep. They push me to the edge and you away from me. I do the best I can, I try to tell the truth and it always seems, always seems to come back to you. I’m trying to move on, I’m trying to be strong, but everytime I close my eyes I feel you in my mind. I feel you in my mind. Everyone says I’m crazy and that’s what I tell myself.
2.
All I've Got 03:29
I know I don’t depend on you, I know it’s not fair. I show my love and I give to you, but I don’t take what you have to share. And maybe it’s not right, but it’s all I’ve ever known, if ever i leaned on someone I just get left alone. So forgive me if my mind is made up, forgive me if I can’t trust your trust. History repeats I can’t lose anymore sleep trying to make something thats not. When it comes down to it, I’m all I’ve got. I know it’s harsh but it’s the way I feel. I’m not trying to put you through hell. You want something done? You do it yourself. No one has proven me wrong. And maybe it’s not right, but it’s all i’ve ever known, if ever i leaned on someone I just get left alone. So forgive me if my mind is made up, forgive me if I can’t trust your trust. History repeats I can’t lose anymore sleep trying to make something thats not. When it comes down to it, I’m all I’ve got. So forgive me if my mind is made up, forgive me if I can’t trust your trust. History repeats I can’t lose anymore sleep trying to make something thats not. When it comes down to it, I’m all I’ve got.
3.
Enough 04:39
I felt alone. I waited at the house but he never came home. He chose it over me. I thought that he was weak. I tried to tell him no, mama, I tried to save his soul. I just can’t say it enough, I just can’t say it enough, I miss him so. I miss him so. I just can’t say it enough, I just can’t say it enough, I miss him so. I let it go. I took in one deep breath and I just let him know he was now forgiven. Live and just let live. The night was young, I took in one big hit and oh the rest was done. I saw him with new eyes, I saw him. I carried him home, mama, and I saw his whole sould. I just can’t say it enough, I just can’t say it enough, He’s beautiful, he’s beautiful I just can’t say it enough, I just can’t say it enough, He’s beautiful. Now I can’t count what I owe, mama, and I’m forever grateful. I just can’t say it enough, I just can’t say it enough, I love him so I just can’t say it enough, I just can’t say it Don’t let me go.
4.
Alone 04:25
It’s getting late and dark outside, the snow is still falling and you’re still on my mind. I’ve never felt so alone, in this small town that I call home. I don’t think there’s a soul who understands this is not the future that I planned. Every day I tell loved ones lies, just so they don’t see past my disguise. Why can’t you look at me that way I look at you? Why don’t you feel the same as I do? Every night I’m asking myself why I’m alone, alone, alone. I’m alone. As you smile and slowly walk away, I turned my head to hide in all that pain. Maybe someday I’ll tell the truth, quit lying to myself quit lying to you. Why can’t you look at me that way I look at you? Why don’t you feel the same as I do? Every night I’m asking myself why I’m alone, alone, alone. I’m alone. Maybe it’s the way I show love, maybe it’s the way I can’t trust maybe it’s cause I keep all my promises. Maybe I should learn from all this and maybe this is happiness. Maybe it is best that I’m alone. But I could love you, like you’ve never known. Why can’t you look at me that way I look at you? Why don’t you feel the same as I do? Every night I’m asking myself why I’m alone, alone, alone. I’m alone. Alone, alone, alone. Alone.
5.
My Feelings 04:08
My wounds are healing faster than I thought, from the moment you left, I felt the shock. Logically I knew how it would be to watch you walk away from me. But my feelings, I can’t control. You’ve pushed and pulled them as far as they can go. I’m not saying this to start a fight, I just miss you in my life. I tried again and again to let you in. But, once I opened up you shot me down again. Why did I keep coming back from more. Why did I? But my feelings, I can’t control. You’ve pushed and pulled them as far as they can go. I’m not saying this to be cruel, just trying to live life without you. Trying to live. And I’ve sworn to never be hurt by you again. But, I’m torn because I’ll love you till’ the end. I know I do this to myself, even though you’re with somebody else. So you’ll do what you do, and I’ll watch myself come throught time after time. I’ll take back what’s mine. Cause my feelings, I can’t control. But, I’m willing to use my soul. I’m not saying this for you, I’m trying to become a new.
6.
Remember when we were young? We sure knew how to have fun. We’d skate away into the dark never asking about the time. We used to play everyday thinking everything was okay. We’d do our best to clean our rooms and make our beds before the day was through. We’d sit in a cardboard car hoping that it would take us far. Pretend to sail the seas so we could know what it’s like to be a pirate, and know just where to find it. The treasures the future would hold. The futures that we didn’t know. As days went by things began to change. But we still found the best on a rainy day. We’d stay up late and break the rules and laugh at those who all would go to school. Though we tried and tried and tried to do what’s right, life showed up and clouded our minds. We felt things we never knew and closed our eyes and hoped it wasn’t true. And we’d drive across the town just for giggles. We would look out at that sea hoping to know how to get back to those days that were relaxed and we’d get back in the car and go home. Trying to make that house we call home, home. And when I see the past, and when I’m looking back I know I made it through because I had you by my side. I know it’s time we took our own paths now. But, please know I’m this way because we met. I know things always change, but I also know that we will stay the same. If I were to repay you, i’d get a lasso and capture you the moon. But, that would not suffice because you have saved my life too many times. But I’d drive across the country just to see you I’d sail across that sea to hold your hand, and whenever you’re in need please know that I will be in reach. I’ll never stop being your friend, I’ll never stop being your friend.
7.
Suitcase 05:30
I made a promise to myself. I tucked it away, In a big old suitcase, to save it for someday. I wrote it down, so no one could find it, hid it in my closet now my dreams are safe. And my suitcase is full, it’s full of my dreams I pick it right up and it’s bursting at the seams. So why should I hide my fears and my doubts. It’s time to let it, let it on out. I don’t know where I’m going, but I know I’m on my way. I’ll know it when I get there, and I’ll send my love your way. I’ll open up that suitcase and I’ll let my life begin. Today will be that someday and I know I should just jump in. Just jump in. It’s gotten to the point where I know I don’t fit in. I’m pushed away everyday and I want to begin again. Cause these shoes I’ve been made to fill, it’s pushing me to hate my self. I’ve wasted all my time and now I’m asking myself why? And my suitcase is full, it’s full of my dreams I pick it right up and it’s bursting at the seams. So why should I hide my fears and my doubts. It’s time to let it, let it on out. I don’t know where I’m going, but I know I’m on my way. I’ll know it when I get there, and I’ll send my love your way. I’ll open up that suitcase and I’ll let my life begin. Today will be that someday and I know I should just jump in. Just jump in. I don’t know where I’m going, but I know I’m on my way. I’ll know it when I get there, and I’ll send my love your way. I’ll open up that suitcase and I’ll let my life begin. Today will be that someday and I know I should just jump in. Just jump in.
8.
Cafe Face 04:18
Sitting still is hard when you walk a day inside my shoes They’re sometimes tight and sometimes loose but sitting still they can not do. Opening up is hard when we are raised to keep our closets shut. If we dared show all our friends our insides out would the world end? Would the world end? Following through is hard when you truly don’t have an excuse. It’s sometimes done, but most times said I really tried but I digress. Coming home is hard when I know inside I can’t be there. What can I do not ask you to, this hypocrite can’t blame you dear. I can’t blame you dear. Loving you is hard because I’ve never felt so complete. It’s odd because I never thought that you would have chosen me. Sitting still is hard when you walk a day inside my shoes. They’re sometimes tight and sometimes loose but sitting still they can not do.

credits

released January 5, 2015

All songs written and composed by members of Johanna Johanna: Elise Tanner, Mike Barney, Tiffani Barney, and Kayley Glauser. Tracks captured and balanced by Terrance DH at Counterpoint Studios, SLC Utah. Special thanks to Annie Prebble, Saundra and Kelly Almond, and Kent Rigby at Midnight Records.

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Johanna Johanna Salt Lake City, Utah

Forged in the depths of Salt Lake City

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